TIPS KEEPING HOUSEHOLD HARMONY

 Harmony Family

Said al-Imam Ghozali in the book of Ihya '"That if the couple do the things below will undoubtedly lasting his household, harmonious and happy both in the world and in the Hereafter; The cases are as follows:

1. The couple should marry to study the religion of religion related to marriage, so the rights of each can be done, because how he knows the rights of each if no basis of religious knowledge.

           Rasulullah sallallaahu alaihi wasallam said:

(طلب العلم فريضة على كل مسلم (رواه مسلم

           Seeking knowledge is obligatory upon every Muslim. (H.R. Muslim)

2. Should a husband be patient with the treatment and akhlaqnya are not good, because no matter what a woman's mind is not the same as men's reason as the words of the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wasallam:

(ما رأيت من ناقصات عقل ودين أغلب على لب الرجل من النساء (رواه البخاري

I do not see a person lacking in intellect and religion who controls the mind of men more than women. (H.R. Bukhori)

(الله الله في النساء فإنهن عوان في أيديكم يعني أسراء أخذتموهن بأمانة الله واستحللتم فروجهن بكلمة الله (رواه نسائي

Watch out for your bad deeds for your wives because they are like captives in your hands, you have taken them with the mandate of Allah and become lawful for you his cock with the words of Allah. (H.R. An Nasa'i)

2. Should a husband should try as much as possible to be romantic to his wife with mencandanya and play with it as it was done the Prophet to his wives, so it is narrated that the Messenger of joking with his wives and the Prophet tried to follow the will of those with whom the joke joke , as narrated by Rasulullah Shallallahu 'alaihi Wasallam never competed in riding the horse, then Rasulullah Shallallahu alaihi Wasallam last won it in another occasion Rasulullah Shallallahu alaihi Wasallam lost syaidatuna Aisha Allaah' anha. So the Prophet Shal¬lallahu Alaihi Wasallam said to him "It was retaliation from you last defeat," as Rasulullah Shallallahu 'alaihi Wa¬sallam sayidatuna joking with his wife Aisha Allaah' anha

Sayyidina say Umar ibn Khottob radhiallahu 'anhu, "should be for a reasonable person to be like a child against his wives". But joking with the wife may even sunnah with not exceeded the limit for example whatever his wife desired because it was desirable because desire lust, so the husband is not authorized in front of the wife and can not prohibit the munk committed by the wife.

Sayyidina say Umar bin Khottob radhiallahu 'anhu "Contrary to what women want because there is a blessing".

Says Imam Hasan Basri, "By Allah no one suamipun obey his wife in everything whatever he wants unless Allah will put him into hell for it". In conclusion, a husband in the family must be a feared inner leader because his authority is at once loved for understanding with the will of the family either when joking or when in serious circumstances.

4. Should a husband not overwhelm his wife to the limit. The jealousy that exists in a husband is a good character, as the words of the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wasallam:

نني القلب

(رواه أبو عمر)

Verily I am a jealous and there is no one who is not jealous of his wife unless he is a man whose heart is turned upside down. (H.R.Abb Umar)

However, it should be noted that jealousy may be done or even a good trait if in place. For example he goes out without her husband's permission or talks with ajnabi men and others. As for if no previous cause then it is jealous of blind and bad nature, because based on prejudice is not good and it is prohibited by our religion as word of Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam

(إن من الغيرة غيرة يبغضها الله عز وجل وهي غيرة الرجل على أهله من غير ريبة (رواه أبو داود

Surely among the jealousy there is a hatred of God that is jealous of the wife for no reason or just because prejudice is not good.

Imam 'Ali (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: "Do not you like to envy your wife without cause because it will cause your wife to be accused of infidelity and you cause it".

5. Should a husband in a living, take the middle road is not too miser or too extravagant because both are prohibited by religion.

6. Should a wife be able to have the nature of qonaah (accepting what it is) to the gift of the husband, and not ask for something beyond the ability of the husband, because it will cause her husband to do unwanted.

But as for example, if their husbands would come out looking for rizki, the sholehah's wife said to her, "O my husband look for the halal rizki because I bear with hunger and misery and can not stand the torment of fire hell".

7. Should the wife keep the husband's property, and not spend it except with permission. Based on the hadith of the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wasallam:

لا يحل لها أن تطعم من بيته إلا بإذنه إلا الرطب من الأطعام الذي يخاف فساده, فإن أطعمت عن رضاه كان لها مثل أجره, وإن أطعمت بغير إذنه كان له الأجر وعليها الوزر رواه أبو داود والبيهقي

Should not be a wife sodaqoh of husband's property except with permission, except as rutob (kurma young) which afraid damaged if not eaten. And if giving alms to the willingness of the husband he can also be rewarded, and if without permission then the reward sodaqoh for the husband and he sins because of it. (H.R. Abu Daud-Baihaqi)

8. A wife should always live in her husband's house and not leave her except with the consent of her husband and if given permission by her husband she should go out of the house in a moslem outfit, avoid the crowd, try to disguise herself, especially to her husband friends and such The wife should be done so that no slander that will disturb the relationship with her husband.

9. Should a wife not talk much with her neighbors except for things that need just because usually if the neighbors gathered if not talking about the lack of a husband or the excess so it makes the hearing angry, jealous, envy and others that ultimately annoying Her husband and made a crack in the relationship.

10. Should a wife prefer the willingness of her husband than his will or family.

11. Should a wife always look beautiful dazzling in front of her husband ready anytime to invite husband to have sex.

12. Should a patient wife in educating her children and not easily cursing them if they break the command, because a mother's curse can come true

13. Should a wife not be proud of her husband both with her beauty and treasures but be like sayyidatina Khodijah radhiallahu 'anha beloved wife of the Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wasallam, where he was originally a rich woman then after the Prophet was appointed to the Prophet he gave all his property For the sake of his da'wah so he put his husband first with his property. Neither do you feel arrogant with her beauty but for example the woman told by Imam Asma'i radhiallahu 'anhu where she once entered a village there she met a couple where her wife is very beautiful and her husband is very ugly, then Imam Asma' I said to the woman, "Why do you want to marry him when you are a beautiful woman?" So the woman replied, "Be quiet, please know that you have done no good with your words because my husband may be a person who is obedient to God then God made me In return and I am a bad person to my Lord so Allah has made my husband in return and will I not be willing with the will of God? "So says the Imam of Asma'i," The answer has shocked me and felt guilty. "

Such are the solemn wives serving their husbands who ultimately perceive in the lives of their harmonious and happy homes and solemn and solehah children. That's a little tips to get and keep the harmony of the household hopefully we can carry out these tips. Amen O 'Lord of the Worlds.